The Ugliest Cars in Britain

Wahey! - even more lush cars...	Paper Bag Rating*
Renault - Vel Satis
	An overwhelming combination of French arrogance, casual indifference and vast quantities of vin-de-table led the Renault designers to team up with a troupe of Albanian street performers for the design of the Vel Satis.
Nissan - Micra
	The clever folks at Nissan have designed this auto specifically for flood prone areas of central Europe, where its ability to sit semi-submerged in fetid flood waters and yet still flash its headlights to attract the attention of rescue boats gives it a significant edge over the competition.
Mazda - 121
	Apparently the citizens of Monmouth (that's somewhere in Wales) love nothing better than scouring the streets for unpleasant cars. According to a local physics teacher (thanks Keith) this activity is also on the school curriculum and he regularly sends his pupils out around the town photographing suitable specimens (and pickpocketing elderly gentlemen) - the booted Mazda 121 shown on the left is one fine example (this one being shown with optional derranged sixth-former).
Renault - Megane
	By extracting the DNA sequence of a bead of sweat from a Turkish sailor's armpit and feeding it into the factory prototype milling machine, Renault were able to release a model that fitted perfectly into their range without the need for an expensive design team.
Nissan Primera
	Nissan is now part of the Renault group and that is really all that needs to be said about the new Primera.
Bond Bug
Thanks to N Heys(?) for sending in this pic of his Bond Bug	Bond cars were rather unsurprisingly owned by Reliant Motors when this freaky tangerine 3-wheeler was introduced around 1970. Probably no coincidence that this was a time in UK history when mind-bending drugs were a common recreational activity.
Daihatsu Copen
	A recent independent survey showed that 82% of drivers in the UK cannot reverse their cars for toffee. Hence the Copen solution. This ingenious car has no front or back and can be driven in either direction by simply swivelling the driver's seat.

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* Paper Bag Rating:

The number of paper bags you would have to wear on your head before accepting a ride in the car.

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